Rev. Ann Robben Dott
Talk - Egolessness - nothing to
defend
Last week Wynne used the expression warriors for
peace and talked about if we treat people with respect and dignity we are headed
in the right direction and we empower ourselves and others. I’d like to talk more about warriorship and
creating a peaceful world or the possibility of enlightened society. Through sitting practice and working with
breath as the object of meditation and training the mind we cultivate
equanimity in all things. Equanimity is
the quality or characteristic of being calm and even-tempered. It is a mental balance. It is being with whatever arises with out
pushing it away and without trying to possess it or bring it in to ones own
sphere of influence. Equanimity allows
one to look upon all with out favor or to see all beings as equal.
From Shambhala Training’s web site: a path of study
and practice of Shambhala warriorship--the tradition of human bravery, not
being afraid of who you are. This path shows how to take the challenges of
daily life in our modern society as opportunities for contemplative practice.
Shambhala Training is inspired by the ancient legend of the
A basic truth of the Shambhala teachings is that we
all want to lead sane, dignified and confident lives, and that this is
possible. If we look directly at our own experience, we can discover a
continuity of wakefulness underlying all the changing conditions. This
wholesome, wakeful presence enables us to experience our lives fully and
directly. In Shambhala Training, this is referred to as "basic
goodness."
The practice of mindfulness-awareness meditation
taught in Shambhala Training programs enables us to look precisely at our state
of mind without trying to alter it. This practice cultivates openness toward
ourselves and our environment, moment by moment. When we practice openness our
lives can be a journey of wakeful and genuine existence. The Shambhala
teachings recognize that the truth of innate human wisdom and basic goodness
does not belong to any one religion or doctrine. We can appreciate all genuine
contemplative paths, whether they stem from the great religions, the arts or
from native spirituality. The Shambhala teachings recognize, however, that this
wisdom arises only when the grasping and confusion of ego is stilled through
continuous commitment to a contemplative discipline.
The title of this talk is Egolessness - Nothing to
Defend.
Philippians
4
6 Do not be
anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with
thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God, which
transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ
Jesus.
8 Finally,
brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is
pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable--if anything is excellent or
praiseworthy--think about such things.
We can either participate in uplifting the world or
debauchery. I found it interesting that
debauchery came up for me as the opposite of creating enlightened society. In the Shambhala teachings it is referred to
as Setting Sun world. Looking up how to
spell debauchery I found the Archaic definition to be: Seduction from morality,
allegiance, or duty. I had also been
thinking of the line about not being able to serve two masters and needing to
choose or as Bob Dylan put it you have to serve somebody.
Matthew 6:24
"No one can serve two masters. Either he will
hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise
the other. You cannot serve both God and Money.“ Where is your allegiance? What is your duty? I would agree with Wynne that we are here to
acknowledge and respect others and help us all to have dignity. In the Shambhala tradition we practice with
ourselves in learning to take our seats with good head and shoulders. A strong back that gives us courage and
fearlessness and an open soft front as we approach the world with
gentleness. As one sits and realizes the
impermanent nature of thoughts and feelings and begins to get a flavor of the
background space one might begin to feel less solid in their identity altogether. We invest so much in our jobs, our
relationships, and our good works or bad habits that they at times identify who
we are. Our roles along with our habits
and thinking patterns construct our personalities and hold our egoic selves
together. Sitting in meditation puts
holes in the fabric as gaps will naturally arise. Continually coming back to the breath cuts
any fear and allows the space for seeing habitual patterns. Bringing habit into consciousness creates
change and over time a long term behavior can dissolve. The more strongly we identify with something
we are letting go of, the scarier it is to the body. You may feel like you are literally dying. If the pattern was established in infancy as
a coping skill or a way to be accepted in the family you may have a fear from
then that if you change you will be ostracized by the group and you will die,
which as an infant you were dependent on your parents for survival, but that is
not the case now. Take a deep breath and
release any fear.
I’d like to read the Recognition part of the
Spiritual Mind Treatment that Ethel wrote for us and CSLNC. “Recognition: As we become still, let us know there is one
great creative force, energy, and intelligence of the universe. We know that all the power, all the presence,
and all the life there is, is God operating her and now at this moment.” God is source, one
great creative force. In Auraveda they
talk of the field of Potentiality also within Buddhism in simple terms the
ground or space from which all phenomena arises. With meditation practice in
the Shambhala tradition your attention is focused on the breath and everything
else is labeled thinking - whether it is thoughts, emotions - fear, anxiety,
joy, or hunger, or physical discomfort.
Always returning to the breath with a release on the out breath in the
way I was taught, training both concentrating the mind on the object of
meditation and on the space or the gap that naturally occurs at the end of the
out breath.
Another in breath, you might be with your breath for
a while then a thought occurs.
After a few years of this practice being my daily
focus it was kind of disconcerting to go to the movies and find I was no longer
getting wrapped up in the story. There I
was in the theater and the movie going on the screen. My mental dialogue popping up here and
there. Noticing the person chewing
popcorn a few seats over to my right.
The movie. The person fidgeting
in their seat a few rows up on the
left. The movie, but awareness of the
whole room and how I was placed in the space - about 2/3 rds back and a little
off center to the left. Watching the
movie - quiet mind. Emotions get triggered
and I ride that feeling. Watching the movie.
A very different process. Lots of
space and being aware of details as they arise into being or
manifestation. God, space full of
potential, is the ground the vary basis from which we live and the mind/us/our
co-creative force is always unfolding, always creating. On one hand all the details and complexity I
notice seems like a lot is going on; but my attention is not going out to any
of these things. My mind is not being
stolen away. I didn’t leave home, loose
my seat, or leave the center of my head.
The emotions didn’t carry me away, the people in the theater though
fully acknowledged in my awareness were not a distraction as I watched the
movie. So there was a strong sense of
nothingness. All this was going on and
nothing much was really getting my attention in the ways that I was used to or
was familiar. I was not going out through my senses to
experience the world. There I was, just
sitting, and all of it was happening without reference to me or any sense of
self. The feeling of no reference point
is what I labeled as disconcerting.
Usually we experience the world in relation to
ourselves, the I, me, ego. With no
reference point the world is not confirming my existence. What is seen; just is. That is clear perception without projecting
on to the world. From Dharma Art by
Chogyam Trungpa page 39 - 41.
Nothing to defend, no self referral, other peoples
action really have nothing to do with you.
Don’t take it personally when others are angry. The emotions of any given situation have very
little to do with what is happening.
Most of what we react to is our own history and buttons being
pushed. This is true for others as
well. Yes we need to be responsible for
not dissing others and acknowledge our part in the dances that we play, but at
the same time the world does not revolve around you or me. Learning this lesson has been a slow one for
me. It first came in learning not to
take others anger personally. Letting go
of the codependant.”oh what did I do or what could I have done differently to
deflect that anger or prevent it altogether.”
It must be my fault thinking as first reaction to bad news. Another side to the it’s not about me coin has to do with letting myself have power and
influence in the world. It is the same
sense of egolessness that has helped me become more comfortable in doing
healing work, being a clairvoyant reader and saying what I see, and speaking
and teaching as a minister. A stronger
and stronger realization of basic goodness and not being afraid of who I am
gives me courage and fearlessness. When
I first encountered fundamentalist Christians who wanted me to say that the
healing work I do was through Jesus it pushed all my buttons. First I didn’t have that strong of a
connection to Jesus and related more to God and often in a formless way. Although I do feel healing energy flow very
powerfully when I am in alignment with Jesus and especially when I am working
with someone who brings him in strongly.
But the whole energy of my religious upbringing comes along with the
phrase, “Through Jesus Christ Our Lord Amen”
Which is what she wanted me to say so I went in to resistance. Ten or more years latter it is not a big deal and
I appreciate Jesus more but I like talking to God. This quote is one I’ve use in my counseling
flyers: Matthew 5:16 “Let your light so
shine before men that they may see your good works and give gory to God.” It is really not about me, I facilitate another person in their healing
process and the energy that flows be it in the form of healing or clairvoyant
reading is the work of God. It is true
also of my role in this church as I am here to serve. I’m not trying to buy or sell anything to
anybody as the chapter on nonaggression puts it from Dharma Art.
“When
we reach the state of nonaggression, it is not that we cease to
perceive
anything, but we begin to perceive in a particular way. With the
absence
of aggression, there is further clarity, because nothing is based on
anxiety
and nothing is based on ideas or ideals of any kind. Instead, we are
beginning
to see things without making any demands. We are no longer
trying
to buy or sell anything to anybody. It is a direct and very personal
experience.
Our
experience of the state of nonaggression becomes so personal that
sometimes
it is quite painful. Because all obstacles of any kind have been
completely
cleared out, for the first time we are seeing things from the point
of
view of pure vision and clarity. We begin to hear music purely and see
colors
and visual objects in their fullest purity. When we become more sensitive
to
experiences in this way, they become more penetrating, and they begin
t
o make more sense. Therefore, there is the possibility of irritation. But at
the
same
time, there is also a lot of humor. We no longer feel that we have to
hassle,
or try to swim across this ocean of tremendous demands the world
makes
on us. We don't have to push against it anymore. There's a sense of
clarity,
which is extraordinarily pleasing, and at the same time, there is a
sense
of overwhelming precision, which makes our experience terribly painful.
So
we could say that this particular journey of seeing things as they are,
experiencing
the iconography and sacred art of the world, is a state of mind.”
When you are working towards egolessness you are working
on letting go of attachments. Pema
Chodron is a Buddhist nun and a well
known teacher and author, also an early
student of Trungpa Rinpoche. A recent
article of hers entitled, How we get unhooked, talks about the Tibetan word
shenpa which is usually translated as attachment, but she says that it is the
sticky feeling or at the subtlest level a sense of closing down. The article goes on talk about how to work
with it. Her closing comments are “As we
practice this way, we gain confidence in our own wisdom. It begins to guide us toward the fundamental
aspect of our being - Spaciousness, warmth and spontaneity.”
Meditation
is on the out breath and dissolving into space for 10 minutes.
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